Mother's Day May 13, 2012 - 22 Years Later

My mother died of breast cancer mets on Mother's Day, May 13, 1990. This year, the dates coincided for another very sad Mother's Day. However...the day was made brighter. My daughter, living in Chicago, invited all of us to her place for the weekend.  Part of the weekend was participation in the Y-Me annual walk (see picture).  Y-Me is a wonderful organization that provides women with breast cancer a 24 hour hotline for support and answering questions.  It has become a lifeline for women with nowhere else to turn.

There were tens of thousands of partipants walking the 3 mile journey through Millenium Park in the heart of Chicago. The weather was glorious. The atmosphere was charged.  The first time I walked a breast cancer event, it was emotionally painful.  I was with other survivors and we were all sharing stories, and I just cried...for my mother and for myself.  I swore I would never do another walk again. It was just too difficult.

However, my daughter had taken up the cause since my diagnosis in late 2008, and I could not say "No" to her. She cares too much.  Her boyfriend's family joined us, which helped to make the walk more fun.  It ended up being a joyous day - with a beautiful brunch to follow the event and a weekend of total frivolity and family love. It doesn't get much better than that.

Update: Not long after the walk, Y-Me mysteriously disappeared off the Internet; their offices shut down too. Wonder where all the money we collected went?

6 Months Later

Everything is going well.  My cancer breast has really shrunk in size after all these months between the surgeries and the radiation.  I call it "Mini-Me."  It's better than crying, right?  I tend to cover my chest with sweaters or jackets so no one call really tell.

In January, I decided to bite the bullet, and make life all about me instead of pleasing everyone else. I went on Weight Watchers, and have done very well. I try to stick to organic foods, and have concentrated more on fruits and vegetables, although I do have to have one sweet per day. I also give myself weekly manicures and exercise more than I used to. So often, we live to make everyone else happy, but exclude ourselves in the process...not anymore. I count too!

In two weeks, I go back to the oncologist for my 6 month checkup. Only 20 more months of Tamoxifen and that part of my life is over.  I don't think about the cancer as much anymore, unless someone mentions someone who was recently diagnosed or died from it.

I am hoping by living a cleaner and healthier lifestyle that I keep the beast away. In the meantime, it feels great to be good to me!!!

3 Years and Counting

Lately, I have been thinking about the breast cancer again.  Not sure if it is because I see a lot of women wearing Susan B. Komen t-shirts from the recent run, or just because I am hearing of more people dying of the disease.

You would think that after all this time and the level of treatment I had, and am still on, that it would not be on my mind, but you really can't stop thinking about it.  Just today, I heard that someone in their mid-40s died after a lengthy battle with recurrent breast cancer.  It is just unfair!

Pinktober and Mammogram

It's that time of the year where we are all surrounded in pink.  You just can't get away from it.  So if you haven't taken the time to get your mammogram this year, think pink, and make that appointment.  Early surveillance, in most case, yields a longer life!

Today was mammogram day.  I dread it.  It was particularly worrisome since, during the annual GYN visit, the doctor was concerned about a hardened area in my radiated breast.  But...GREAT NEWS!!!  All is well.  There are no changes from last year, and I can wait another full year before another mammogram.  Kudos to Tamoxifen and all its nasty side effects.  Three years out and I'm cancer-free!

May next year bring me continued good news...  Happy Pinktober everyone!

Summertime and the Living is Easy

I have officially passed the half-way point for Tamoxifen treatment.  While the many side effects have been annoying to the point that I cringe before taking the medicine, I still forge ahead, always keeping in mind that the alternative is far worse.

As I near the 3 year anniversary of my diagnosis, I can look back and find the good things that came out of the experience.  I have learned to love myself a little more and am taking better care of myself.  Pampering myself is a big change from taking care of everyone else. I am now working in a job where the atmosphere is light and fun. Where work was once the primary source of stress, it is now "fun" and I don't mind going to work every day. 

My next mammogram is in October.  That's always a bit scary, but I can feel assured that I continue to do all I can to keep the cancer from returning.  In the meantime, I'm enjoying the summer...the flowers and the warm weather, playing with my sweet dogs, and spending time with my wonderful family and friends. It really doesn't get much better than this, living a peaceful dependable life.

2-1/2 Years Later

In April, I had my 6 months check-up with the oncologist. The Tamoxifen, while creating some uncomfortable side effects, has treated my body well, and now I'm half-way over treatment. My next oncology visit is in October, right after, my next digital mammography. The bottom line: All is good!

Two Year Oncology Visit

More good news. My oncology visit was short and sweet. The blood work was perfect and coupled with my good mammogram last Friday, it doesn't get better than this. I'm to continue with the Tamoxifen. Next appointment is in six months.

Stepping Out for Breast Cancer Luncheon

Yesterday, I attended a beautiful luncheon sponsored by the "Stepping Out for Breast Cancer" organization. This all volunteer organization was created 13 years ago (I hope I have the right time frame) to provide services and improve the lives of women with breast cancer in Anne Arundel County, Maryland. All of their funding goes to services - most unusual in these times.

Thanks to Lynn Kay, my college roommate and very dear friend, who works selflessly for this organization and many others for inviting me to attend. The room was filled with pink - flowers, balloons, chocolate lollipops, pink cupcakes, and pink sherbert. There were wonderful vendors who graciously donated a portion of profits for the cause, but more importantly, the room was filled with women of all ages who believe in finding a cure.

Dr. Rachel Brem from George Washington University Hospital was the guest speaker and caught everyone up to date with the latest radiation technologies used to diagnose breast cancer earlier and more accurately.

A wonderful afternoon for a wonderful cause!

Race for the Cure 2010

On Friday, I had my 2nd survivor year mammogram and all was good! This was the first time in years I only needed one set of films and now I don't have to go back for another year. So sweet! Prior to the exam, I made a promise to myself that if all was well, I'd participate in the Race for the Cure. Oh...way before, I had signed up and had received my dark pink t-shirt with the words Survivor on it, but could not get the nerve to go. But now I had no excuse. All was going well. I had a lot to be grateful for and it was time to show it!

My dear friend, Sharon, kept encouraging me to go with her. She had participated for the past 3 years, and found it to be an inspiring event. So at 5:45 AM yesterday, we headed off to the local Lowe's to catch a shuttle bus to the event. It was dark and cold, but so exciting! There were tents everywhere. Women dressed in pink as survivors and white as supporters.

At 6:40 AM, all the survivors walked together in between 2 pink ribbons toward a large grandstand, where we were each given a beautiful pink rose. All of us had the number of years of survival in pink ribbons on our hats, and together many of us cried as we stood together and looked out at all the people who offered their love and support to all of us who had heard the devestating diagnosis and endured the many different treatment paths. I cried for my mother and others, who was not fortunate enough to be alive now when all these wonderful diagnostic tools and treatments were available. I also cried in happiness that someone like Nancy Brinker had the motivation, knowledge, and connections to make breast cancer survival a priority and has not faltered a day in making it a reality through the Susan B. Komen foundation.

Thousands and thousands of supports and survivors ran or walked together (see picture). At the end, I was encouraged to walk on the left side of the road and instead of pink ribbons, there were rows of people slapping my hands in celebration. It was a beautiful moment and beautiful day.

Almost at the 2 Year Mark

It's hard to believe it's been almost 2 years since my breast cancer diagnosis. Except for the hot flashes from the Tamoxifen and a tinier breast, I really don't think about it much.

However, in early October, I'll have my next mammogram, and I'll be praying that everything will be fine. Before that, I'll have a pelvic sonogram to make sure that the Tamoxifen isn't causing any problems with my uterus, another side effect of the drug.

I'll try not to worry before then, and just go from day to day grateful for what I have and all I have to look forward to.